Beach closed but there's a Sea Breeze!

Hey all you cool cats and kittens out there!

Yes, yes, I totally hopped on the Tiger King train. Why not? And, yes, it definitely held my attention for a solid 7 hours.

How's everyone doing out there? Anyone? Anyone?

We are hanging in there in Cayman, although, it would seem as though almost every single thing that provides islanders joy has now been taken away from us. Ok...calm down, Kirstie. Even I can admit that statement was just a little dramatic.

Here's the deal. We alternate between "soft" and "hard" curfew hours. From 5am until 7pm Monday-Saturday,  we can leave the house for 90 minutes a day to exercise. We are still alternating grocery shopping days by surname, so for example, we can shop Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, given our surname falls in the L-Z category. Grocery lines are generally long-ish (and hot!) and police check your ID to ensure that you are shopping on your designated day. Sundays are "hard curfew" days which means we are not allowed to leave our house. This was all ok and do-able, until they closed our beaches last week. We are not permitted to walk on the beach, swim in the ocean, or even so much as dip a sweaty little toe in that Caribbean Sea!  The beach closure was totally foreseeable - you would have to have your head buried in the sand to not see that coming (see what I did there?). There were some selfish assholes (yes, that's exactly how i feel!) who were congregating with coolers on the beach, which resulted in the removal of our beach privileges. In addition, we used to be allowed to drive to exercise destinations (i.e drive to Camana Bay and go for a walk), but they recently announced that is no longer permitted as well. And don't even think that sneaking out Bo-Bo. Fines range from $300 to $700 CI for breaking curfew rules, and they will issue you a ticket right then and there. The police helicopter circles the island multiple times a day, there are police check-stops situated all around the island, and the beaches and shorelines are patrolled by police boats and police quads. It's intense, man. Intense!

So how do I feel about this? Well, as you may have gathered by my tone, I am disappointed and frustrated. Like many many people on the island (too many I guess), the beach was my solace. I looked forward to daily walks and pool noodle exercise when my knees were sore. The beach was definitely the highlight of my week. Week after week our privileges are being removed one at a time, and one can't help but feel powerless in this situation. How much longer can this go on, and what will be taken away next?

I am also concerned for a lot of my kiddos. I recently delivered some water to a home that has no running water (many school staff are doing this). When I saw the conditions that this family was living in (and definitely not the worst on island), I felt so sad for my little buds who must experience uncomfortable,  long-ass days at home. How can we even expect these children to access our online lessons when some of these kiddos are likely experiencing abuse and neglect on a regular basis, not to mention the fact that they don't have access to basic necessities, let alone high speed internet? It breaks my heart knowing that school, the one constant and source of predictability in their lives, is unlikely to open anytime in the near future. Everyone, but especially these children, are going to require some intense post-trauma intervention when this is all over. It makes me feel like an asshole for complaining about being holed up in my 1300 sq ft. condo with ocean views, that's for sure.

But...I get it. I do believe that this is all necessary. Cayman is not experiencing "widespread community transmission" at this time, and obviously the point of all of this is to prevent that from happening. I am a science-minded person. I see the numbers. I understand the graphs. I have faith that our government is truly putting the health of this island first, and I completely trust our Chief Medical Officer and the Premier's plan that has been put into place. I see that if our island can eradicate the virus, we have the opportunity to re-open our country. Although our borders will not be opening anytime soon, wouldn't it be incredible if Cayman could be corona-free and services could be back up and running for all of us who have remained on island.

That doesn't mean that I still can't feel sad, disappointed, and bored- oh!!! The monotony!!!! Every morning, as I sweat profusely in the 89% humidity sticky climate while walking the dog, I gaze longingly at the crystal clear pool (closed!) and the cool turquoise ocean (closed), I silently scream "FUUUUUUUUU#%!"

Some days feel like they will never end and others go by quite quickly. One of my childhood idols, Candace Cameron Bure (AKA DJ Tanner from Full House) Instagram lives her workouts with her trainer. I never miss these sessions and, my 12-year old nerdy self attempts to "talk" to DJ through Insta, just hoping for an acknowledgement. I attempt to grab her attention by announcing that I am joining all the way from the Cayman Islands! Alas, she has yet to read my desperate attempts at contact. So you know...it's good to have goals.

I celebrated my 41st birthday this week. I propose that a birthday during Covid should not count, and I will just wait to celebrate my 41st next year, but it came and went, and it would appear that I am, in fact, one year older. I did receive the most happiness-inducing birthday gift that an islander could possibly receive right now - I got a bike! It's a little rusty and needed some TLC, but Evan managed to find me "Sea Breeze" (I named it!), my beautiful little island bike. The walking was taking a toll on my knees so now I can ride my bike around West Bay. There are nice little dirt roads near Barker's Beach that are pretty and shaded and provide a glimpse of the beautiful sea. I now have a daily event to look forward to! When I was 7 or 8 years old I got a beautiful pink bike aptly named "Cotton Candy" that brought me incredible joy (until it was stolen a year later - who the F steals a little girls pink bike?) I'm pretty sure my reaction to "Sea Breeze" was just as spectacular 33 years later! Funny how life comes full circle, hey?

I took Sea Breeze for an extended tour on my birthday, and drove up and down the roads at Barker's Beach. A ray of light was shining down perfectly between the trees and I decided that it was the ideal opportunity to snap a great picture of my new bike. As I gently set the bike against the tree and attempted to get the lighting just perfect, I heard a vehicle pull up behind me and a stern voice inquire, "Ma'am, what are you doing?"

Shit. It was the police.

"Oh hi. I'm just taking a picture of my bike."

I could see the Officer look at me suspiciously. It was obvious that he did not believe me.

"Were you going to walk on the beach?" he asked.

"No No. I explained. You see, today is my birthday and I got this bike. I just wanted to get a good picture of it." At that moment I shamelessly retrieved my phone from it's hiding place inside my sports bra to show him the photograph.

The Officer shook his head incredulously. His eyes screamed "crazy bitch" but he calmly replied, "Just don't go on the beach," and he drove away.

So I dodged a bullet there. I wasn't technically on the beach, but a $700CI fine would have hurt pretty good, especially on the day of my birth! I guess Sea Breeze is fuelling the rebellious biker-chick that's been stagnant inside of me for 41 years.

Well, that's all I got. I hope everyone is finding a "Sea Breeze" moment in their day!

In all of it's glory

scene of the crime

No worries I have a legit mask now

Bingo!

Hey guys,

I hope you all are hanging in there.

We are doing just fine here on our little island. Our government has implemented a combination of "soft curfew" hours and "hard curfew" hours over the next 2 weeks. Here's how it works: If your surname begins with A-K you are allowed to leave your house on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays to go to the grocery store, bank, and/or pharmacy between the hours of 6am and 7pm. Surnames L-Z can leave the house on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays during those same hours. From 7pm until 6am, we are in "hard curfew," which means that you are not allowed to leave your house. In addition, Sundays are now considered "hard curfew" days, which means that you cannot leave your house at all on Sundays. Essential services are exempt from the curfew. There are check stops scattered around the island and police are checking ID for surnames and issuing $250 CI to $500 CI tickets for breaking curfew rules. In addition, police helicopters, quads, and boats are constantly patrolling the shoreline for anyone in breach of curfew. It's pretty surreal to let the dog out for a pee at 8pm and hear complete silence other than the distance whirring of a helicopter blade.

And what about our precious beach time? We are allowed to exercise at the beach for 90 min a day during soft curfew hours. Here is where it gets tricky: apparently everyone has a different view of "exercise." Most would assume it means walking or swimming, but some people think that drinking a pina colada in their beach chair qualifies! Ha. I was walking on the beach the other day and noticed a family of 4 sitting under their umbrella. As the flashing lights of a police boat approached, I heard the father shout, "Stand up and do jumping jacks!" I had to laugh as his wife and 2 children quickly went into "exercise" mode.

We now have 35 confirmed positive cases in the Cayman Islands, with our first positive case on Cayman Brac announced yesterday. The case on the Brac is very concerning, as the island's population is less than 3000 and is comprised heavily of elderly residents. Most of the cases in Grand can be traced back to travel, but we do now have a couple with no known history, indicating community spread.

It's such a strange time for everyone, isn' it?  I feel extremely isolated from the rest of the world, which makes me alternate between feeling terrified and feeling comforted.

There is one daily event that brings me comfort (and provides a few laughs), and that is our routine press conference at 2pm. Everyday our Premier, Chief Medical Officer (My favorite, Dr. Lee), Police Commissioner, and Minister of Health address the public and update us on the latest. Dr Lee reports new cases in his always calm manner, our Premier (self-proclaimed Grim Reaper) lists the latest death toll around the world (whilst making us feel shame for leaving our house), the police Commissioner details some ridiculous crime some loser has committed (evading police on a motorbike for curfew violation), and our Health Minister shares one of his "interesting" poems, recites "stay at home" in a different language each day, and then prays for us. It sounds quite dull, but it isn't. You see, Cayman has really gotten into the spirit of things and has created Bingo cards to use while you are watching (Bingo squares include: panel laughs at dumb question from facebook, Dr. Lee's voice is soothing AF, audio malfunction). Alternatively, you can turn this into a drinking game and get absolutely bombed in 10 minutes. It's all quite entertaining. In addition, talented Caymanians have also begun producing songs/jingles, using press conference coverage for the #stayhomecayman campaign. They have innovatively turned the Health Ministers poem into a reggae sensation, and added instrumentals to the Premier's warnings. It's all really creative and although it's an alarming and upsetting topic, I typically leave the 2pm press conference engaged in humorous whatsapp convos with friends, commenting on the Minister's efforts to speak Swahili, wondering which language he will tackle tomorrow, and anticipating the next remix.

Now I know that is all very serious business, and some might think it's ignorant to joke around about what essentially is a somber press conference, but let me explain what this is actually doing for our island. When you spend an hour a day with this panel, you feel like you are personally involved. You feel directly responsible for every positive case. When thousands of people tune in at 2pm everyday, although they are whatsapping each other funny press conference memes, they are listening to the very important message being conveyed. When only 1-2 people out of 60,000 are breaching curfew, you know that people are taking this seriously. I feel like I am a part of very tight-knit community that takes great pride in where we live, and will do anything to protect it and it's people. So I really do believe that this daily live press conference is an incredible thing that is increasing compliance in Cayman, as well as bringing us together during such a weird time...and if it results in a drinking game gone bad, well, at least you are safe at home, hey?

Cheers everyone. Stay safe.