Nobody likes a whiner, but it's my blog, so I'm going to whine for just a little bit...
This is why I was sad this week:
- Many of my students did not have a nice Christmas break. It broke my heart when I heard, "Santa didn't come because I am bad" and "Santa fell asleep and forgot my house." The sucky reality is that, for many of the children with whom I work, Christmas was not a joyous family occasion. Truth bomb: Sometimes I feel guilty about the fact that Evan and I have such a loving and stable home and have chosen not to bring a child into it, when there are so many children in crappy situations.
- My knees sucked. I'm not sure why. Let's call it a "January flare up." I came home from work a few days and could barely walk. I hate that feeling. It reminds me of shitty days and often starts a spiral of negative thoughts that my surgery has failed or that the disease is progressing.
- More than a few of my co-workers have resigned and are moving on. Since Monty passed, nothing has been the same at work. So many changes have been implemented this year in the schools and to our department, and many colleagues are over it. I will really miss these faces at work, but I don't blame them for seeking a happier job environment. Work has been tough.
- There is a dog I see everyday on my way to school. He is chained to a doghouse and barely has room to turn around. I've submitted a formal report, but what I really want to do is sneak in and free him from that damn chain. The mistreatment of animals makes me incredibly sad, pisses me right off, and unfortunately is a common problem here on our beautiful island.
- The koalas!! Such a beautiful country is on fire. Oh my goodness these Australian fires are so so so sad.
- The missile accidentally shot down an airplane? WTF. All those poor innocent people! The news is a plethora of despair these days.
Ok, I've got more but I'm going to stop there. Does anyone else feel like this right now? Surely I can't be alone. I don't consider myself to be a negative person, but I'm struggling to find positivity at the moment. And...I know I know....I live in a beautiful place where the sun shines and temperatures never dip below 25 degrees. I have so much to be grateful for! And for the record, I am not attempting to trump anyone's sadness. I know that many people are going through a lot more than I am right now! But doesn't everyone have the "right" to feel sad? Why do we feel guilt and shame admitting when we feel sad? It's a natural human emotion and I'm gonna throw it out there and say it's OK to feel sad. It's healthy to feel sad. For a little while, anyway. Wallow in your sadness for a bit and then move on.
So...what can I do? I have the power to pull myself out of this....what? Blue hole?
I'm going to offer up some advice and then I'm going to try my best to take it:
1) Repetition:
Children love to be read the same story repeatedly. Even when it drives their parents crazy! The repetition has a calming effect on children. I truly believe that adults are the same. There is something safe and comforting about predictability. That is why I watch "Friends" episodes when I feel crappy. I know each and every episode by heart. I am comforted by the fact that I know Joey will walk in the room during the next scene and say "How you doin'?" So go revisit a book, movie, or TV show that you enjoyed to excess and your youth. Suggestions include: Sex and the City, Dirty Dancing, and Goldilocks and the Three Bears.
2) Hugs:
Did you know that when we are hugged our body releases a chemical called oxytocin? Oxytocin is associated with happiness - it decreases your blood pressure and decreases norepinephrine - a stress hormone. My friends are going to laugh at this one because they know that I am often opposed to hugging. What I am opposed to is "obligation hugging." An obligation hug is one of those awkward hugs you give when you are unsure as to how to greet someone. I am not; however, opposed to a solid authentic "I care about you" hug. My body also releases a whole whack of oxytocin when I hug my pets. I'm not sure if my pets always enjoy this, but hey, I don't always enjoy picking up their poop either.
3) Cry it out:
Sometimes you just need a good cry. My good cry occurred quite spontaneously when Heart's "How do I get you alone" came on the radio on my drive back from the gym. As salty tears and wayward snot ran down my face, I dodged chickens and the usual drunk West Bay drivers on the road to my home. A good cry does the body good, but I highly recommend NOT doing it in your vehicle whilst driving.
4) Exercise:
Cliche, I know. But science doesn't lie, my friends. Once the heart starts pumping, the endorphins are released, and you receive a natural mood boost. Plus...when you are sweating away on the treadmill, your mind doesn't have the luxury of analyzing all your negative thoughts and spiralling them out of control. Take that, mind! Not to mention that it feels pretty good to burn away those Christmas calories.
5) Talk to people:
I was pretty amazed to find out that I wasn't the only one with the January blues this week. I mentioned it in passing to a few people - coworkers, friends, family, and almost everyone with whom I spoke agreed that they felt it too! It's not just me?! There is something comforting about knowing that you are not alone in your despair. Also - knowing that someone else shares my sadness motivates me to cheer them up. Just the act of cracking a joke to boost someone else's mood can help boost your own.
Ok. That's what I've got. Let me know if you have any other suggestions. I'm off to the gym to cry on the treadmill! ;)
Cheers, friends!
